Vampires are said to have many weaknesses to balance out their incredible powers. The vampire lord Draluc just so happens to be weak to... everything. He dies, disintegrating into a pile of sand, at the slightest shock.

After a disastrous encounter with the vampire hunter (and author) Ronaldo leaves Draluc's castle destroyed, Draluc decides to pack up his remaining belongings and adorable armadillo familiar John and move into Ronaldo's office (despite the hunter's protests). Chaos ensues as this unlikely duo is forced to work together while fending off perverted vampires, Ronaldo's terrifying editor, Draluc's eccentric family, and more—with Draluc dying continuously along the way.

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